Wifey and I decided to spontaneously go out for a drink at about 10:40 tonight. We usually don't go out or whatever but just felt like getting out of the house. We went to our friendly local Applebees. Every table or at least 2/3rds of them had a kid and it was almost eleven when we got there. A couple times when we first got here we went there a bit on the late side say 8-9ish and saw a few kids. Enough to notice and discuss it. We sort of floated the hypothesis that since it cools down later in the evening peoples schedules sort of shift later.
Back home I don't think I've seen little kids out at all much past 8 let alone sitting down to dinner.
Is our local applebees just a haven for parents who do not put their kids to bed or is this some sort of a regional/ cultural thing? I am really curious.
“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.” — Robert A. Heinlein
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12 comments:
Ryan...In this economy no one can afford a baby sitter!
Then they should go out to dinner at 6 and have their kids in bed at a decent hour. Better yet they should eat dinner at home at 6 and put the 20 dollar difference between cooking and 3 eating out into savings.
It is not regional, it happens here in the mid west too. I think it has more to do with society and a general lack of responsibility that seems prevalent today rather than the economy. If you cant afford a babysitter stay home, cook a meal and read or talk to your kids.
It depends on the quality of the parents. Good ones go out earlier and get their kids in bed at a reasonable hour---9PM at the latest. Those parents more interested in themselves than their kids, don't
7:27, Interesting.
Crucis, That could well be the answer. It just seemed to be a few too many families for it to be as simple as them all being selfish parents.
theotherryan: I don't think it's "just" selfishness, but more like an irresponsible attitude and placing their interests first. My daughter & SIL insure their three kids are in bed by 9:00pm at the latest, 8:30pm during school.
They like to go out, have friends overs and visit others. By in common with their friends, also parents, the arrivals are early and well as departures and they still seem to be able to spend at least four hours at a gathering.
On occasion, we babysit, but that's not habitual nor overused. It was just the way they were raised.
As an aside, the two older grandkids will be going to a private school this coming year. Tuition is $8k each. Neither my daughter/SIL nor us helping can afford that much. But, when the desire is there, the means can be worked out. The Tuition is being paid by some scholarships and sweat equity by the parents.
That is the kind of parents you can be proud of.
When we were growing up we use to have supper at 7-8p. I think it depends on what time of the year it is and how many people work shift. If you work a different shift than first, your schedule is changed and your family, if they want to interact with you, must change also. In summer the kids are out of school and it often doesnt cool down until later . So it might be a combination of things. Who knows?
It seems to me that unless it is affecting me it is none of my concern.
A question. Are you more concerned that the kids are out late and the parents are suppose to have their kids in bed at a decent hour. Whats a decent hour? 9pm. Really? A good parent must work first shift and bad parents not see their hids until the weekend. Come on.
While I agree that there is a general lack of responsibility personal and otherwise, to blame it on selfish parents when we dont know the whole situation is folly at best.
Crucis, Makes sense. Glad the grand kids are getting the sort of education their parents want for them.
Lweson, I wouldn't say I am concerned parse. I am not going to live around here when those kids become adults so if they suck at life or not it isn't my problem. I am mainly just curious. There was a kid at every table. Doubt everyone there worked a shift that either started at midnight or got off at 8.
You are probably right that it is a combination of things.
I notice a lot of people equate not going to bed early with bad parenting. What I think they mean is that they assume the kids aren't getting enough sleep. What if they are doing the European thing and taking a long nap in the (hot, humid, and miserable) afternoon, then having dinner at 9-10 pm? What if, since it's the summer, they are letting their kids stay up late and sleep in late.
As long as they get enough quality sleep, does it really matter when?
Michael, Interesting thoughts. I suppose every random person in that restaurant could be doing the 'European' thing. Methinks they are not.
Michael, that "European" tradition arose through the lack of air conditioning. The cool of the evening was the highlight of the day. Europe, for the most part is further north than the US. Dusk occurs much later.
Now, when there is air conditioning available, the habit persists. There is no reason to maintain that tradition other than habit.
Here is the US, there is not any tradition of "siesta." At least not in the states outside of the sourthwest. There is no such tradition of staying out late. On the contrary, the US has a much different tradition. Some call it a work ethic.
That tradition grew out of our agricultural roots.
Small children need much more sleep than adults. During school, they must be up early and be alert for class. You can not build that habit by ruining it over the summer. Not without impact to the children.
People who keep their kids out that late have no concern for their children. The impact to them nor what the kids learn by observing their parents and other adults.
There is an old adage concerning raising a child. "More is caught, than taught."
That is what this issue is about.
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