Quote of the Day

"I live my life as a social conservative, but won't impose my personal moral code on others. I expect the same courtesy from others."
-Chief Instructor http://bisonrma.blogspot.com/

Little Choices

The thing is that life is just a series of small choices. We make them literally every day. Over time these choices add up to our lives. While we are somewhat constrained by various rules, regulations and laws I don't see a point in dwelling on that. You can work to change things you don't like, figure out how to deal with them, ignore them, whine and complain or some combination theiron. However please remember that a choice to do something you really can't afford or put away a few dollars, hit the weight pile and road for a run or sit on the couch eating fast food, practice your skills and improve your preps or sit staring at the TV and or computer. These choices will over time add up to your life. Make good ones.

Letter to my sister- Communication and Bug Out Plans

I got to talk to my little sister for awhile today. Not doing a great job of keeping up with them in general, and especially since I have been here is a failure of mine. Anyway she is doing pretty well. Also making some good progress in preparedness. She has a loaner pistol, a modest on hand stash of cash, a growing stash of food and a coleman stove as well and camping gear. Her next plan is to stock up on fuel for the stove. I suggested some more staple food (pancake mix, rice, etc) because it can feed you for a long time for not a lot of money and is good to have around in general. She asked me about communication today. After talking a bit I realized what she really meant was communication and plans. Without getting into too much detail if things get hairy she is going to travel approximately 25 miles to a place with a better setup. She would have 1 child and 1 adult coming along. I told her I would think on it a bit and then write a post. So here we are. Obviously if cell phones, the internet and landlines are all functioning it is pretty easy to make a plan. If you need my help with that one I don't think there is anything I can do for you. Obviously we are talking about times when modern communications such as we know and come to rely on them are not working at optimal levels. There are numerous reasons this may be but the end results are the same so no point in discussing them. Interestingly my little sister is young enough that by the time she was self mobile and active with a part time job, friends, etc she had a cell phone and pretty much everyone else did also. Being able to call anybody, from anywhere, at any time is basically a given for probably everybody below the 35-27 year old (depending on exact location, socio economic status, etc) range. There is a reason that my sister said communications and I am focusing in on plans. Communications for if power/ cell phones/ the net are not working is pretty doable if you are willing to work at it AND THE OTHER PEOPLE YOU PLAN TO TALK TO ARE ALSO. First of all a simple land line with an old corded phone solves most problems as phone companies have batteries that will run the length of most power outages. So for the cost of keeping a land line you can typically make calls to other land lines. Personally I don't have many plans at this time that rely on being able to talk to anybody so it is not worth the expense. However that is different for everyone. The more complicated question is how to talk when you and the person you want to talk to are not both at places with a land line, and know where the other person is to call that line.

FRS (family band, the motorolla type you see families with camping, etc) radios are line of sight. I say again these radios are line of sight. I have personally used them for over 10 miles but it was ridge to ridge in the mountains with nothing but air in between. In the woods, flats or town a range measured in hundreds of meters is probably realistic. These you will have to test in your AO but they do not have the range to be useful outside of your farm or neighborhood in any case. The next options is CB radios, yes like the kind that truckers use. I do not know a ton about these other than that you can buy them at radio shack or on the internet and that everyone has a cool name called a handle. These are nice because also like FRS you do not need a license to operate them, at least IIRC correctly. These are far more powerful than FRS and have a much longer range. I'm not positive but I think several miles is quite realistic. I've heard you can boost the power and thus the range drastically but that is not legal. These are probably good for talking across town or to the next town a couple miles down the road and a good part of the county. For most families these would probably be a good solution. Modest cost and modest hassle for a pretty good range. To get further there are two viable options that I can think of ham radio and satphones. Ham radio is more of a hassle than CB but not overwhelming I don't think. It is on my list of things to do. Satelite phones are a great option but at great expense.

Sometimes I answer a question in a very different way because I know what people mean. My sister said communication but MEANT PLANS. Her, BF and whomever else could get CB's for less than the price of a one night getaway to a large regional city and be able to communicate easily if they so choose. Of course it should be noted that these radios are not secure and are in fact the equivalent of yelling in a large dark room full of people. Everyone listening might not know who is talking but they hear the message. However for this type of scenario assuming you keep conversation relatively vague and do not mention your super secret bunker or convenient to access huge stash of Krudgerrand's it is all good. Most of the desired communication is so generic it would not matter. Useful conversation like "I am near X so it is more convenient for me to pick up the kids, see you at home" would be just fine. The root issue however is plans.

Plans are a very broad topic which would be impossible to address fully in a post. IIRC another guy did a great post on this topic once but I cannot remember or find it to link to. Simply put you need a plan on how you are going to go from a variety of everyday situations (at home, at work, running errands, kids at a friends/ school/ daycare, etc) to wherever you are planning to go (home, a relatives house, a bunker in the woods, etc) with whatever stuff you think would be useful under a variety of circumstances including closed roads, downed bridges, possible riots/ security issues. Travel through dense urban areas, areas with numerous choke points such as bridges or tunnels and just plain long distances substantially complicate planning and decrease the odds of a successful trip under bad circumstances. Driving through the burbs out of town to your uncles farm 50 miles away is probably a strait forward plan, unless there are 2 sets of projects and 6 bridges along the way. The good news is that if you had to rate the complication of these trips from 1 being super easy and 10 being cross country starting in NYC the trip my sister plans would be about a 1.5 as there are a few areas which are denser than I would like and a choke point or two.

Since the route is not an issue the big thing is getting everyone consolidated and ready to go in a quick orderly fashion. Numerous questions must be thought through in advance. Do you leave work or finish the shift (what is the decision point between the two)? Who picks up the kids? What vehicle(s) are you taking? What stuff is getting packed? Where is it? If someone does not make it home right away how long do you wait or do you go without them? If you go without them what supplies do you leave behind? What stuff is most important for you to take? These questions cover a lot of ground which is why it is best that you do not decide this stuff on the fly, or even worse on the fly when you and an important family member (spouse, adult child, etc) are not together. The consequences for you zigging and them zagging could be significant ranging from unpleasant (them sitting in a cold dark house eating uncooked food) to downright disasterous. Having the ability to communicate helps a lot but radios fail when you need them most so it is better to figure this stuff out. You need to know that if there is a terrorist attack or a riot your husband is coming home but if there is a bad snowstorm he might have to finish the shift. Maybe the plan for one scenario is for the fam to wait a little while to link up at home and for another (snow storm comes to mind) they will head out separately. This is where having a plan for packing is key. Obviously every adult would need their defensive weapons (a pistol is enough for most of these scenarios and that is just because you should carry one anyway), their 72 hour bag and standard car emergency stuff. Combat loading is probably a good idea for the rest of your stuff. Simply put combat loading divides stuff into smaller groups based upon suppying a sub group, instead of all like items. That way if a boat/ plane or truck goes down it does not have all the ammo, fuel, food, etc. This would be most important if you plan to leave separately and or take multiple vehicles. One car having all the clothes and shelter stuff, another the food and a third the ammo and fuel would be a bad plan.

I know this covered a lot of ground and I am not sure where else to take it. Any questions?

Ask Me Anything

Well the title pretty much sums it up. The only questions I will not answer or will be vague about are OPSEC or personally identifiable information related. Other than that I will do my best to answer your questions fully.
Please ask away.

Changes

I've been here in Afghanistan for several months now. Starting to get it pretty ironed out how I am going to operate for the duration and am on the best schedule I can be. I would say that I am doing ok, all things considered. Now I am trying to improve some little things to raise the bar of my functionality and happiness a bit. In this my attention is turning to blogging. Aside from work I eat, exercise, sleep, talk to Wifey, surf the net a little bit and blog, that is pretty much my life. As for the blog I feel like I am getting kind of stale. One part of it is that I am not preparing in the active, doing things sort of sense that lends itself to making great posts. Not a lot I can do about that one. The other thing is that I feel really disconnected from you guys. It is more like I am just talking than the fun, interactive barroom full of friends venue I enjoy. Right now I can think of two things that will help with this. First I am going to make time to reply to comments. It should only take 10-15 minutes a day and I have the time. I have not been good about that. Also I am going to try and start posting stuff sooner after I write it. A discussion about something I thought day or two ago is interesting but something written weeks ago is often out of my head entirely. Hopefully this will help liven things up.

Edited to include: Today I noticed I have been a very bad blogger and there has not been a post for a week. Oops!

Thoughts Since Fatherhood

I find that as my life progresses my perspective and preparedness concerns change. When I was single I didn't have many worried, at least relatively speaking for one of the most paranoid people you know. Sure I kept plenty of arms, food, water, etc around but worst case I am used to existing pretty comfortably in rather spartan conditions. Getting married has helped me mature and grow in most things including preparedness. First of all Wifey is a pretty good check of whether something is really useful or just a thing I want. That has been a pretty good check on my gun nut tendencies and made our preps a whole lot more wholistic. Also being accountable to another person changed a lot of my habits, as it changed hers. When single you can choose to blow most of your money on a gun or a trip or whatever and be poor for awhile. When married you (assuming good marital choices) balance eachother out a lot. It isn't about one person being in control or not just that, like the two keys on the nuclear codes it balances things out and lets cooler heads make better decisions. I think Walker is a huge step in that because it means that WE have to factor in how our decisions will affect him. So instead of being stoners and constantly being broke while living in a rathole we should probably get (in our case keep) our act together to provide a decent residence for kiddo as well as a reasonably decent lifestyle.

Also kiddo has made me think A LOT more about bugging in options. Simply put tiny babies can't move and need all kinds of support to live. While taking off with a backpack would be really hard for a pair of healthy adults with a baby it would take lava and zombies to get us to pull a runner. So we need to beef up our resources in terms of food and fuel to support us for a prolonged period without outside assistance. More on that to follow later. Also laundry is a pretty big concern. Lucky we already have a plan for that. Got to try the cloth diapers in our hand washer at some point bit I imagine it would work just fine.

It has been another reminder about how much having your financial house in order matters. Not that we are in bad shape there or are spending a ton of money on anything parse just that we need to be able to support kiddo no matter what else is going on. That takes cash.

Interesting List

Interesting List
FerFal over at Surviving in Argentina found a list and pictures of what Raymond Davis, the CIA 'contractor' who shot two Pakistani robber's and got into that whole PR nightmare had on his person and in his vehicle. Of course everyones needs are different so you shouldn't necessarily just copy it but definitely worth reading and thinking about. Hat tip to Fer Fal for the great find!

Spares

One of my guys broke something today. A pretty important thing that we needed. I found out by accident when a couple guys were standing near me and 'looking for the extra piece'. In other words one functional piece of equipment was now missing an essential piece. Pretty quickly we got to talking and it was clear that we had a spare one. A guy who wasn't following the conversation stumbled up. I asked if HE had brought a plan to deal with the deadlined item. He said "we needed two so we brought two" to which I asked "what if one breaks?" and got a confused look. Then I said "this is why I make you bring extra stuff, because things break and when important things break it is a problem."

I got to thinking about a conversation a bunch of guys and I were having while waiting for something years ago. We were talking about guns and he talked fondly about his Sig P220 and somehow it came up that he owned 1 magazine for it. I asked what he planned to do if that magazine was lost, broken or worn out. He said something about just going to the store and getting another one. To which I asked "what if you couldn't get one at the store for whatever reason?" An at least somewhat like minded individual who happens to keep a big box of mags for his AR's and I exchanged a 'we both know what we are talking about and he doesn't have a clue' kind of look. I just don't like being dependent upon any single item. Doubly so if that item is electrical, mechanical or small enough to be lost. The only situation where I can see not having a replacement or two lying around is if an item is not prone to loss or breaking (example, kitchen table) or stocking up is really cost prohibitive (it takes a long time to get any sort of redundancy in quality defensive firearms.) When you talk about simple and relatively affordable items like magazines, can openers, knives, flashlights, etc there just isn't a good reason not to have another lying around.

Slings 2

I am just going to come out and say that every rifle should have a sling. Heck, for the price of most of the commonly available slings it wouldn't be a bad idea to have a few spares floating around. I suspect if more hunting and recreational rifles got pressed into real use their owners would really like a sling. Also you just never know when a good piece of leather or nylon webbing might come in handy. I am just going to come out and say that I like two point slings in a defensive/ tactical consideration. I find that one point slings leave the weapon hanging low and prone to moving excessively. Since there is no attachment on the front it doesn't take much to get it swinging if you aren't holding it. Yeah as a general rule you should have at least a hand on it but stuff happens. I find that a two point sling gives you all the mobility of a one point but the weapon stays where it should be and higher. To have a one point sling stay high enough for my liking I would need to have the strap that goes around the head and shoulder so tight it would be slow to put on. A real downside in a home defense situation. That brings us to three point slings. These are sort of like a swing for the fences type hitter in baseball. They either work really well or don't. I find that even on the most minimalist and well constructed three point type slings they are complicated and can be cumbersome. There are straps and buckles and attachments all over the place and it is easy to get tangled up or snagged in them. Nothing loses cool points faster than being that guy who gets tangled in the fancy sling on a cool rifle. However when they work these offer great control and your ability to easily transfer to a primary weapon is very good. Also they keep the weapon stable and give you very good renention. To me a properly mounted two point sling adjusted to the right size is super simple, carries well and fits my minimalist and practical nature. However it is definitely worth noting that my personal preferences are just that, personal preferences. Some folks like one point slings and have got solid reasons for it. Others like 3 point/ tac slings and can articulately explain why they like them.

I have used 3 points with some success on the traditional AR platform. They do not however translate well to the M4 or the AK. Also it is a down side that you just about need a PHD in mechanical engineering to put some of them onto the darn rifle.


I guess what I am saying is that you should put some thought into a sling. You don't necessarily need anothing complicated. My AK sling for a long time was a piece of 550 cord measured to the right length and securely tied on the front sling mount and where the buttstock meets the receiver. I just wanted something in case I needed to toss it around my neck and go hands free in a home defense scenario. It would have gotten pretty uncomfortable on a 10 mile patrol or a day on guard duty but for my need it was just fine. Best of all it cost me nothing (would have cost a quarter or so if I had purchased the cord just for the project). The point I am getting at is that a sling doesn't need to be fancy or complicated but it does need to be well thought out and to meet your needs well.

Random Winter Thoughts

I have had this notepad document open for a couple hours now. For whatever reason nothing is jumping out of my head and onto the page. It is cold, and windy today with light intermittent snowfall. Definitely the kind of day that makes me think about wood stoves and hot chocolate. The winter weather here is pretty serious in comparison to anything except crazy semi Arctic conditions in places like Minessota and Alaska. The weather is pretty continually bad. It is difficult and somewhat hazardous to travel; not so much that you can't get where you need to go but more that you don't want to take long winding drives through the mountains for no good reason. I think the winter is nice because it is a great time to cook all those warm, heavy staple type meals that I enjoy. Chili, chicken and dumpings or whatnot in the summer just doesn't seem quite right. Also I feel a bit better about just being lazy in the winter. Not that you should be lazy exactly but I am often pretty tired from work and just don't feel like doing anything in the evening. Especially here in Europe (I think because we are pretty far north) it stays light quite late in the evening. During the winter it is at least dark when I got bed at 9 oclock. I don't think the winter is so good for travel. Even if the roads are OK it makes an otherwise pleasant trip that includes sight seeing and lots of walking less than entirely desirable. I think in the future we probably will not travel (for sight seeing type things) to non warm places between November and March or so. For us it is probably better to just save up a good traveling wad and go somewhere nice in the spring. I do think the winter is an easier time to save money. For some in certain jobs (construction, logging, etc) the winter offers pretty regular income disruptions but for those outside of that select few jobs I just think it is easier. Less of a temptation to spend money on travel, going out, recreation and such. Often we forgo our usual date night during the winter. Driving to a restaurant when it is nasty just isn't all that smart so we cook something and just stay home.

Winter is however a more challenging time to keep yourself motivated to do all kinds of training. You see a lot more people out on the roads and streets logging a few miles of running when the weather is good than when it is cold and wet. Going shooting turns from a great day to almost a chore. Since we are usually wearing bulky warm clothes and eating all those good starchy comfort foods it is easy to slip on a few extra pounds. The holidays really hurt that one too. Lots of nice dinners, coctail parties and plates of cookies floating around. I don't think we need to completely forgo these fun and enjoyable traditions but some moderation is probably wise. There is a reason so many folks want to lose weight as a New Years Resolution. I find it really helps to limit your holiday season a bit and give yourself a logically defined period where you can indulge a bit more than usual. Far better to have two or three weeks of a more relaxed diet then just cutting loose from a week before Thanksgiving to New Years Day. Personally for me Thanksgiving is a two or three day thing. The day itself then a couple days worth of heavy leftovers. Turkey sandwiches don't hurt you much but those first few days of duplicate reheated dinners to include desert can sure add up. I usually do about a week and a half before Christmas Eve to the day after Christmas and a one day pass for New Years Eve. Also try to keep exercising through the holiday season. Even if it isn't of the same type and intensity of your normal workouts anything is better than nothing. It might seem dumb but it is often the difference between being up maybe 5 pounds and 10+.

I think Winter is a good concealed carry season. In cold climates you can carry basically whatever you want easily and comfortably. If I had to pick a season that is best to start carrying concealed (aside from whatever season it is when you read this) it would be winter. It is a lot more forgiving and most people can easily do it with clothes they already own and not need to adjust their habits much. A lot of tell tale giveaway are countered by a jacket made to keep you warm in the snow which could give a Newbie time to figure things out without 'making themself'. Do however remember that a gun under a zipped and buttoned coat is about as good as no gun at all. As a private citizen you are almost always going to be reacting (versus acting) and thus time matters a lot. A mugger or murderer could walk around for hours, calmly unbutton and unzip his coat then go on with his evil deads. As peacable civilians we do not have that luxury. One way or another by the time you get that coat open the fight is going to be over. I find wearing a medium to heavy shirt/ sweatshirt/ sweater and then leaving my coat unbuttoned is the best way to go. There is always pocket carry but personally I think you want it in a holster that is secured inside the pocket. I have just tucked a little revolver into my coat pocket but unless your hand is on the grip (which gets inconvenient and conspicuous) it isn't a good or reliable draw.

The additional time most people spend at home during the winter can be put to good use. Read a couple books to better inform yourself. Save some money and pay down debt. Check, inventory and update your bags, gear and equipment. Winter is a good time to give your weapons a good deep cleaning.

Put the winter to good use and enjoy it.

US Debt Downgraded

This morning I went in to work half asleep as usual. I am able to get moving quicker than most folks but am still not quite myself until I've been up for a half hour and or had a cup of coffee. Someone said in passing "US Debt was downgraded" and it caught my attention enough to walk over and ask if he was serious. He was and gave me the one sentence summary of it then moved on to something else. This part was kind of interesting.

Remember the scene in Snatch (if you haven't seen it you really should) where the two black guys who run the pawn shop and their friend walk into the office and find Brick Top (an old crazy english gangster with funny glasses) sitting on the couch? Well it got the two guys attention because there was an old, odd looking man sitting on the couch in their supposedly locked office. The third knew who Brick Top was and what his presence there meant, that it was very bad. This was kind of like that. Certainly it will get everybodies attention, if just for a second, but only some who keep track of these sort of things know how really bad it is.

For a lot of reasons I have been somewhat complacent recently but this definitely changed that. While not a suprise parse I didn't think anything like this would happen so soon. It definitely made me take stock of things.

On the bright side I am really happy Wifey and Walker are at home with family. It would be nice if I was around, both for psychological and functional (healthy young men with military training are useful) reasons, they are in the best possible place they could be. This makes me very glad we made that choice.

I had been (maybe mistakenly) waiting for PM's to take a hard dip before buying again. That plan is out the window. I made a big, for us, purchase and feel better knowing that a little bit more of our buying power is now not dollar denominated. Also I am looking at filling a few gaps that have been present for awhile. I HAD planned to just stash cash and do a good round of buying when I get back but that plan is now out the window. Also I have a few more ideas and need to do some more thinking and talk with the Wife about them.

Get your house in order while it is still possible and reasonably affordable. I don't mean to tell you that the world is ending and you should put every dime into beans and bullets or anything like that. However if there is something you have been meaning to do, or a purchase you have been meaning to make and can reasonably afford them it is time to do it. Could be food, training, PM's, guns, ammo, whatever. There may well be some bad stuff coming so if you want something and can (please don't use credit or spend irresponsibly) afford it them it's time to get it.

If our nation does not get it's economic house in order sooner instead of later we may have some very ugly times ahead.

Priorities

It is so interesting to me what people consider to be important. Maybe it is more clear to say it is very interesting to me what people consider important and then what they say 'I don't have money for that' about. Aside from a relatively small circle of people who I personally know well and care about I really don't care at all what people choose to spend their money on. Most people like something be it guns, jewelry, boats, horses, cars, electronics, clothes or who knows what else. While I cannot help but note that some objects are probably more practical than others (an expensive sleeping bag versus a pair of designer heals or a Glock versus an Ipad) it is just a matter of personal preference and it is not my place to make value judgements. The biggest place I see this is with insurance. If you are renting or anything other than owning a home you would simply be stupid not to have renters insurance. For $10-20 a normal person with average posessions can be covered. Do however check the deductibles and limits on certain items. You might (if you want to report owning such items) be well advised to have a writer for high value type items. A pretty nice jewelry or gun collection could be insured for just a couple bucks more. Medical insurance is a slightly more complicated topic because it isn't cheap. I am not going to tell you to get medical insurance before a roof over your head, food and fuel. I am however going to say that right after those true absolute (to live in a modern manner) necessities the next thing I would buy would be health insurance. Not having it is truly madness. In my family we have had 4 in patient hospitalizations in the last few months and we are (though I am rethinking this one) pretty healthy people. If we did not have insurance we would either be paying medical bills forever or default on them. The cruel irony of insurance is that those who need it the least can actually afford it the most. However life is hard so I suggest getting your family covered. It is also interesting when people decide to go super cheap on life saving type items. I have a friend who keeps his $100ish Hi Point 9mm in his $25k truck. Now I don't want to get bogged down into the Hi Point debate but I will say I wouldn't want to rely on a $100 semi automatic pistol for my life. You don't need super expensive guns but the guy might be a bit better off with a $350 used Glock (or whatever) and a $24,750 truck. You don't need to go out and buy the best high end custom/ tactical/ expedition grade everything, especially if you are on a tight budget. However getting good reliable gear is just smart. If you get slightly more basic used items the sticker shock is a bit more palitable.

I have a hard time understanding people who 'can't afford to save'. I can get how anybody can have a really bad month but unless you are about to get a much better job it is never going to get easier. The cruel irony is that those who have the hardest time saving are the ones who need to save the most. Someone who earns a good living and lives sanely can take a modest car repair or a bigger than normal electric bill in stride. Someone who fully supports themself working at Jack in the Box can't. Folks in any income bracket who live well below their means do not have a hard time saving and have less of a need because they can adjust and deal with stuff in any given month. Folks right on the edge can't do that.

Wifey and I watch the Real Housewives series, mostly the Orange County one. There was drama on the show about how some of the ladies homes were being foreclosed on. This honestly shocked me. I said something like "if they are so rich why do these people have mortgages?" to which Wifey replied "They couldn't afford that super fancy house living that way. All they look at is if it is nice and they can afford (possibly under ideal conditions) the payment". I guess it was shocking to me because if I made anywhere near that kind of money I would very quickly own a home. I mean own as in I paid it off, had a great mortgage burning party and it is 100% mine. Maybe I would upgrade later but I would do so for cash. As the smart money say one of the biggest obstacles to actually becoming rich is acting rich before you are. I think there is a significant difference between being rich and acting rich. I think most people who read this blog are aware that you can, despite popular culture's evidence to the contrary, be rish and not live like it. I think the difference between the actually rich and those who live like it is when there is a bit of a down turn, either personal or in the economy.

Other then the glaring 'are you serious' kind of priorities some people hold I just find this an interesting thing to observe. Some folks like new cool cars or trucks and others love to travel. Some like boats and others like jewelry or guns. Some folks go out to the movies regularly and others to dinner or the bar. You can probably tell a good amount about a person by their priorities.

Personally I prioritize saving and travel. I somewhat indulge myself by eating out and keeping/ building a nice firearms collection however as of late that has probably became more proportional if just by my income growing.

What do you prioritize?

Also you can tell a lot by what people prioritize very low. I don't care much about fancy or new vehicles. We tend to buy most things used and really skimp on stuff like furniture.

What do you prioritize very low?

People Money Things

Suze Orman is a pretty regular feature at our home on late Sunday mornings. Now that kiddo is around we are far more likely to be awake so we tend to watch a bit more often. Anyway she has this saying "people, then money, then things." I found myself thinking about it today because Wifey mentioned that she watched Suze this morning. Like most of those catch type phrases from successful folks in that type of field it makes sense. To me it means that you need to take care of people, especially those you care about even if it doesn't make perfect economic sense. (She has a bit called 'Can you afford it?" where people call in, tell her what they want to buy and their info and she runs the numbers. It is an interesting segment.) I remember one in particular where a woman REALLY wanted to remodel the house and add a bathroom. The numbers weren't bad but they weren't great either. However they had 3 teenaged girls and one bathroom so the situation was far from ideal. Suze suggested they do it even though it didn't make perfect money sense because it would really positively impace/ stop a negative impact on the lives of people they cared about. Along the same lines if a family member was seriously ill I would travel to see them even if it meant using plastic. The concept is that you next worry about money and getting yourself squared away there. Once money is taken care of with an emergency fund, low debt and retirement savings coming from your income you can worry about things. A pretty sound premace I think. People screw it up by putting it in the wrong order. They have a bad tendency to go things then people then money. The real issue is that they put things in front of people. In doing this they put themselves in situation where they are forced (by themselves and their lifestyle) to have the spouse work instead of staying at home with the kids. They are forced (again by their own actions and choices) to work at jobs they hate to pay for stuff. I get it if you really like the stuff and in the grand scheme of things are happy with the exchange. Some folks truly do work and live that way happily. They hate their job but love their house/ car/ boat/ whatever so it works out. However for lots of other folks it doesn't balance out and they aren't happy. Once the new car smell wears off and you get used to the leather seats, sweet navigation/ sound system and powerful engine a new BMW 325 is just another car to drive to a job they hate and for errands. By over emphasizing things they put themselves in a situation where people aren't happy.

Some folks just do not see the connection between their earning/ work pattern and their spending. It sounds stupid but lots of people habitually buy stuff they really can't afford on credit and fundamentally live right up to or past their means and don't understand how they are not getting ahead. They are totally missing the point. It might sound cliche but I seriously wonder how their life would be different if they could understand the idea of this simple concept as I (and many other people) do. Even if they chose not to change a thing they would have turned a serious corner in understanding. By turning this corner they would see that they way their are spending is affecting their lifestyle in more ways than they currently imagine. If they chose to live the same way that would be find and dandy however I cannot see that happening. Instead of seeing a new couch they might see a week less of vacation. Instead of seeing a brand new car the might well see the Mrs being able to stay at home with the kids.

Manliness

There is a lot of talk about how men are changing. A few years ago the whole metrosexual term came about to define strait men who did things like waxing, tanning, dying their hair, etc which had otherwise been done predominantly (or maybe in a narrow minded view by popular culture) done by gay men. Some recent writings by Patrice have gotten me thinking about the nature of being a man and manliness. TV shows and sitcom's in particular are not usually kind to men. They have a fat sloppy guy with a mediocre job who somehow has a banging hot wife. Maybe that is just a good setup for a TV show and I am overthinking things. I cannot help but note that during the 60's and 70's in addition to breaking down the family one of the most notable things about the womens lib movement was that it essentially pushed lots of women to try to act like men and fill traditionally male jobs (talking more fire fighter, construction, etc then stock broker, CEO type stuff). While women should be able to vote and some other obvious common sense stuff some of these elements of the womens lib movement were just stupid. Saying that a woman is equal to a man is a whole different thing then saying she is the same as a man. You gal's aren't better or worse, just different. Men are bigger, faster and stronger than women. Of course the Bulgarian national women's powerlifting team is stronger than a high school mens chess club but if we compare random person on the street or athletes of comparable status the truth comes out. There is a reason that every honestly competitive sport segregates men and women. Anyway I am not sure how or why I just got side tracked.

In any case I think there are some definite traits of manliness. To me being self reliant is a big one. Of course we can't all do everything but being able to take care of the basic problems that come up in your lifestyle is probably realistic.